PAIN IS WEAKNESS LEAVING THE BODY

On my way to a birthday party, waiting at a red light behind a motorcycle,
I was thinking about my 56 year old friend. Professionally, he is a healer, but now he is the patient, very sick with colitis. Friends and family gathered on his birthday to bring loving energy instead of gifts and libations. This wise group knew that pity and sadness would not contribute to his healing process; rather they acknowledged the celebration of life and the strength of our friend to manage his own journey. Before the light changed, I glanced up to read the back of the biker’s tee shirt, “Pain is weakness leaving the body.”
What a perfect message!

When loved ones are suffering, we want to help, or empathize, but we have to trust that the person can resolve their issue by understanding the arrival of pain in their life. The joyful energy we brought to our friend that day made his journey lighter, that’s what we can do for each other. My Bee-A-Reader recommendation is Louise L. Hay’s book, “You Can Heal Your Life.”

I have battled chronic illnesses and recollect the frustration. I cried a lot, suppressed it with drugs, and beat it down with surgery. It wasn’t obvious while I was suffering, but my body was telling me something. Pain is the baby inside you, crying for attention.

Anger is an example of emotional pain coming out of the body. A depressed person has a low vibration, a numbness of spirit. Anger is actually a higher vibration, less numb and more awake despite that we perceive it as a negative emotion; it’s a sign that your energy is moving closer to happiness. The book, “Ask and It Is Given,” by Esther and Jerry Hicks, charts the emotional scale with depression as the lowest vibration and happiness as the highest. The authors suggest slowly replacing lower emotions with higher ones. When you are depressed, it’s impossible to suddenly replace that emotion with joy. For example, if you have reached anger after being depressed, that is progress. Then frustration is higher than anger, and above frustration is hopelessness. Being stuck in one emotional place is worse than moving to a more positive emotional state. These steps show how progress is being made. We might not recognize this unless we know how emotions work.

When we are hurt, energy instinctually becomes focused on survival. An animal that has been injured will immediately lick the area, and continue obsessing on it for comfort. Humans behave that way when physically or emotionally wounded. If there is no spiritual understanding of why pain comes into our lives, or tools to work thru its arrival, the intense focus on it can lead to addictions, neurotic behaviors, and being caught in the pattern of licking the wounds over and over.

The better option is to embrace pain, not allowing it to make you weak. The marines use this phrase to inspire endurance and strength. Pain should not be feared, but released, knowing that it is only temporary, signaling an opportunity to become stronger. Pain becomes that weakness leaving your body that you replace with a strong muscle for future challenges. Each time it shows up, you have the opportunity to become stronger. Strength lies in awareness, acceptance, and release.

If you or someone you love is physically or emotionally sick, be strong and faithful to the process, understand that pain is not bad luck, but a helpful messenger.

MISE EN SCENE: A Film Critique

Nora Ephron’s “Julie and Julia” has a unique narrative strategy. Two heroines sharing the same dilemma, “What am I going to be when I grow up?” This revelation signals the desire to live a meaningful life. Thirty year old Julie Powell and fifty year old Julia Child are feeling a tug on their souls.

It’s a rare for a female central character to have a supportive spouse and a healthy marriage, two in one film is monumental. The angst of finding a good man is missing in “Julie and Julia” instead we have two enviable relationships. How refreshing!

Both women come to the conclusion that food is the key to their personal success. Julie begins a rigorous challenge to prepare and conquer the 524 recipes in Julia Child’s revolutionary French cookbook “Mastering the Art of French Cooking” in 365 days. At a different point in history, Julia begins to study French cooking, leading to the creation of the aforementioned cookbook. Julie Powell has the challenge of working full time and producing glamorous food in her closet-sized kitchen. And Julia Child has to overcome, well…the French.

Many critics have already claimed that the double cream capacities of Meryl Streep as superb actor, and the perfect impersonation of a famous personality eclipsed the Julie side of the film. Amy Adams role was less meaty because she played the “Any-woman” who was lucky to be discovered. Her character gave women in the audience hope, but Meryl as Julia was incredible to watch. Adams might have been a better contender if she hadn’t portrayed a sanitized version of the real life Julie Powell. Perhaps it was a decision designed to hit a greater audience at the PG-13 rating.

It took awhile for me to digest this tepid film. The problem was, the pot never boiled. The crescendos leading to crisis create an attachment to the main character. After we identify with her, and what she needs, we want her to get it. When monsters, mountains, and mayhem get in the way, we become invested in the struggle. There weren’t any here. The few blips such as Julia getting into the advanced class with men, and Julie’s reporter not showing for dinner, drifted away like tumble weed.

Before you start your argument, let me remind you of the late Paul Harvey. He layered suspense, delay, and artful dodging, subtle forms of foreplay that make storytelling great. Be honest, we love tension, (not necessarily the Maury Povich kind) and a strong narrative structure demands a climax. An unreachable goal for our heroine to overcome is just more satisfying and delicious.

My recommendation is rental. Don't miss the experience of Meryl Streep as Julia Child, or the intriguing relationship with her husband played by sexy Stanley Tucci. How about a Julia Child mini-series starring Meryl Streep?

Bon Appetite!

SLEEP WALKING

What in the world is going on with women’s shoes these days? Why are fashionable shoes masochistic and comfortable ones ugly? Footwear is not exclusive to the runway or clubbing, but look into any shoe store and you’d think differently; too high, too flimsy, and construction so cheap you’d only be able to withstand a few hours of wear. Anything practical is clunky, unattractive, and hard to find.
Even sedentary women step one mile per day on their feet. Can they tolerate that in 3 inch heels? In a sea of terrible design and shameful lack of quality from our best designers, we are wearing garbage and not outraged. I would go so far to say, women are ignoring their suffering and victims of fashion brainwashing. Designers are out of touch and I am out of luck finding decent shoes for the simple matter of walking at least one mile per day.

After shopping at Mayfair Mall and DSW, I was disgusted by my options. DSW had endless rows of ridiculous choices: very high heeled boots, torturous thongs with no arch support, spindly high heels, cheap knit boots that could hardly survive a day in the snow, ballet slippers with life-less soles, uncomfortably hot rubber rain boots, elf shoes curled up at the toes, and sneakers with a tapered toe box. Where are we supposed to put our last two toes? What’s the deal with every sneaker having a nasty cropped toe box? Every single pair of shoes I looked at was unacceptable and problematic.

Women teetering about in ridiculously high heels claiming, “They’re really comfortable!” are in fierce denial. They won’t walk any further than they have to, and by the end of the day they’re whining and rubbing their sore feet. When your feet are jacked up on stilts, it distorts your spine. This is not conjecture ladies, its fact. If your vanity insists you injure yourself because you’re too short, your legs look slimmer, or your man gets turned on, the agony of nerve pain, bunion surgery, and disc herniation are probably the only things that will wake you up. And they will…

We need decent attractive shoes! I want women to realize our shoes are not being made well, and then stop buying the crap. “When I snap my fingers, you will wake up refreshed and aware. Your goal will be to insist shoe designers and manufacturers create shoes WORTHY of your feet. This will happen by only purchasing well made designs, from companies who produce healthy shoes.” The obsession for fashion has made us unconscious sleepwalkers willing to live in discomfort for --- what? Shoes are a necessity for mobility, comfort and preservation of our feet and spines!

Bee Aware! Bee Outraged! Bee Choosier!